CFN– Last weekend I was asked the following question: “What do you think is the secret to preventing divorce?” One thing about me is that I am generally not a fast thinker and, at the time, could not answer the question. Later that day I brought the subject up with the questioner’s life partner and had the thought that preventing divorce is subject to many factors, one of which is the concept of being in a state of conscious evolution. What on earth does that mean?
You would not be reading this unless you were interested in matters concerning the spirit. Therefore, this tells me that you are a person who desires to work towards a better world and deeply wants to be part of that transformation. Amid the doom and gloom, there is a ray of hope in your mind and spirit that there is a better way to do things, that somehow we will all come together and flourish peacefully. The thing is that we are all wondering where the roadmap is and how on earth we are going to get there with all of our own pressing concerns and issues overwhelming us. We all have them and as soon as we begin to yearn, to imagine, to strive for spiritual growth all the roadblocks come up with great strength seemingly to derail the process. So it is with all our relationships, there is no easy way through these barriers, we have to figure out ways to dismantle them. That leads us back to the concept of conscious evolution- simply to strive to develop virtues, those spiritual capacities that are our bundle of inner core operating instructions that serve as a guide for every lived moment. Virtues are the spiritual weapons we develop in order to deal with all of the attacks, challenges, overwhelm, addictions, impediments etc that assail each and every one of us. A few virtues examples are: love, honesty, truthfulness, care, kindness, courage and joy. Virtues are much stronger than weaknesses, the trouble is that many of us in our society are not educated spiritually, and therefore, don’t know this. So, we act from our lower self, the one that is afraid and anxious.
The reality of North American society now is that most people are now single, married couples are in the minority. So, for people to find love today is a huge challenge. And those that are married are subject to the forces that are disintegrating the bonds that unite us, because we are so driven by competition, distractions and materialistic pursuits. How can we change this reality?
In terms of the initial question of “What do we need to do to not get divorced?” I would ask people to rephrase that to a more positive inquiry such as “What do we need to do to consciously evolve and grow together in relationship to ourselves and to one another?” This re-framing of the inquiry can help to shift the energy from worry, fear and anxiety to a state of being curious and open-minded. Conscious evolution is the leading edge of human thought. There are many voices out there who speak eloquently about the urgent need for us to evolve so that we can come together to solve the problems that are assailing us on every side. You and I, as individuals can begin to ask ourselves new questions, questions like:
Who am I now?
What kind of condition do I want to be in when I leave this world?
How do I bridge the now and the end state?
What are my patterns that hold me back from moving forward?
What is conscious evolution?
What is the motivation that I have to consciously evolve?
Who will I be?
What is my heart’s desire for my life?
What is my calling?
Who can I speak to about this?
Where is the roadmap?
Who else is on this journey?
Do I desire a mate who also wants to be conscious?
What does my mate think about the concept of conscious evolution and do we want to do this together? Who will I be in such a relationship?
What would it feel like, taste like, smell like, be like, sound like, if we were consciously evolving?
So, for those of us who are single, this may be a way to find a whole new way of relating to ourselves and to others, a mindful way forward to connection, relatedness and a path of service for the betterment of our little corner of the world.
Please share your thoughts in the comments section or, you can contact spiritmatters9@gmail.com. Thank you for your interest.
Shirley Barr lives and works in Cornwall, Ontario and is a member of the Bahá’í
Community.